Part 16 Of The Continuing Series, St. Louis’s Perfect Slinger: Three Monkeys

Posted: April 22, 2010 in slinger, STL: Tower Grove South
Tags: , ,

The sign.

Welcome to the newest installment on The 13 Blog! As you can see, we’ve moved over to a WordPress.  After doing some work on The ACSTL Fanatic I really began to enjoy it, so I swapped it over here too!

Well, without any further ado, let’s get it on!

So, I got a picture message on my phone about three weeks ago.  It was a picture of the Three Monkeys Menu showing a slinger, at least that’s what I found it out it was after confirming…it was a bad picture.  The sender’s not a good phonetographer like me.  So, the date was decided upon, and out we went!

Three Monkeys is not a place I’d have ever thought of looked for a slinger, if I’m being totally honest.  This is an somewhat upscale place in Tower Grove South.  I mean, they do have Kobe Beef burgers on their menu.  Of course it’s the American Kobe, but still.  So, when the ya try to class up the slinger, it usually doesn’t end too well, but let’s see how they want to do this.

Full on menu.

Now, I had never been into the Three Monkeys, though I had been wanting to go for sometime, so I didn’t precisely know what to expect.  It is a much larger place than I had expected, and being early on a Saturday, it wasn’t too packed either.  We sat down right away and I looked at the menu.  I always want to get an idea as to what’s going to be going on with my slingers.

Now here’s where it gets a bit interesting.  You may recall my trip to the 12th St. Diner, where everybody told me about the bacon on the slinger.  So I really wanted a baconated slinger, and went home that day unsatisfied, but hark!  Something unique the slinger at Three Monkeys is!  Here you have the choice of three different meats…only one an accepted slinger offering.  Now, due to the rules, I can purchase any ON MENU version of the slinger….  So, they’re offering bacon, ham, or sausage as the meat part…I went with the bacon!

Condiments for your own usage.

So, I placed my order with our server:

Slinger. Eggs scrambled, with bacon.  What I forgot to mention earlier is that this slinger comes with breakfast potatoes and NOT hashbrowns…uh oh.  OK. We’ll see how it goes.  It might be better than all of the other ones that didn’t have proper hashbrowns.  Hell, it might even be the first good one yet!


So, I begin surveying my surroundings as we wait.  It’s a pretty nice looking place.  It’s not exactly my kind of place, in terms of eating or drinking, but I really do think I still want to try that damned Kobe Beef burger.  Oh well.

The lay of the land.

It did seem to take a bit longer than it should have to get our food delivered to us, but what can I do besides wait it out?

When it finally did come out, this thing was absolutely HUGE.  Now, I know in a lot of places, the slingers are gigantic, and would be worthy of being shown on Man Versus Food, but t his is the King of all the Monsters, this thing is Godzilla running amok on Monster Island.  Am I getting through on the concept of how damned big this thing is?  I don’t know if anyone could finish one of these.   OK…one more simile…this thing is as big as the fight between King Kong and Godzilla in the move of basically the same name!

So, let’s get a look at the King of all the Slingers!

Boom goes the dynamite.

Now, I know on a scant 425 X 318 picture, you really can’t grasp the bigness of this thing, but I’ve a couple other slinger pics so you can really get a good handle on the enormity of this thing.

The bacon is very real.

Now, here you can get a small sense of what the deuce I’m talking about…but you know, I’m spending way too much time on the size and not how it was used aren’t I?

So, I got the bacon because I’m tired of sausage on my slingers.  Hamburger is my preferred, but I wanted to change it up a bit.  They used very thin slices of cheddar cheese, and quite honestly, wasn’t all that noticeable in the flavor.  More would have been nice.  There were some onions there, and I could taste them, which is always perfect on the slinger.  They need the onion tang I think.  The chili was just meh. What it needed was a thinner chili, or just significantly more of it.   This is the kind of slinger where one needs ketchup.  I also chose not to mix up the bacon into the slinger, but eat it as a side dish.  That was a mistake.  The eggs were ok.

Now let’s get to those potatoes.  OK. A slinger is: eggs, chili, meat patty, and hashbrowns.  When you change the hashbrowns you’re really messing with the fundamentals of the slinger here.   At least these were breakfast potatoes and not boiled potatoes.  I could at least eat this.  Breakfast potatoes are a whole different animal to me than hashbrowns.  It’s like trying to healthy up the slinger.  Breakfast potatoes aren’t greasy.  They’re not even well, all that flavorful really. Stick with hash browns.  They have a much better flavor, and really mix into a slinger much better. That’s really all there is to that.

Here’s the last attempt to get you to see the Optimus Prime style largeness of this thing.  I ate about half of this beast and could still fill up about half of a styrofoam to go box.  We all know how big those are right?

Well, despite all my protestations about how wrong it was, I still ate it didn’t I?  On top of that, I had it for brunch the next day too…but it still didn’t taste like a proper slinger to me.  Three Monkeys tried to class up the slinger and when you mess with stuff like that…the result is never better than the original.

For my soccer fans, I’m also contributing at  The AC St. Louis Fanatic Blog as well.
Next up: Hammerstones Slinger…(I promise this time.)
  1. […] Just remember going in, this slinger’s got no grease to it.  It reminded me a lot of the Three Monkeys’s Slinger, even down to breakfast potatoes, and it was surely […]

  2. […] Now, here’s another variation on the potatoes, again I’m not a big fan of these, but breakfast potatoes.  To me really seems like they’re trying to class up the dish.  The example on the right was purchased at the Soulard Coffee Garden, but I have also gotten t hem at the Three Monkeys. […]

  3. […] me, let’s get this show going.  We ended up choosing Local Harvest Cafe.  When we went to The Three Monkeys, we found that Local Harvest also had a slinger on their menu.  We put that one in the bank and […]

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